躲避球：一个真正的卧底故事Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story Movie Script

But with seven-time ADAA All-Star Patches O'Houlihan at the helm, I guess it must be the luck of the Irish.

Tomorrow we're gonna pecker-slap those Globo Gym bastards.

Yeah.

- You really think we can beat Globo Gym?

- As long as we got Patches, we got a shot.

My God.

Well, it's probably the way he would have wanted to go.

- What?

- What are we gonna do without Patches?

We're gonna get our taints handed to us.

- What's a taint?

- I dunno. Sounds bad.

Maybe you should go say something to the guys.

Yeah.

They don't make a "sorry your coach just got crushed by two tons of irony" Hallmark card.

I'll be right back.

What?

We're opening a new Globo Gym in Mexico City. I've been boning up on my Spanish.

Me'Shell was having some digestive problems. I hope you don't mind.

Will you shut that?

For all of us, baby.

So that's the deal. I give you $100,000, you sign over the deed to your gym.

Period.

End o'story.

You really think you can come here and buy me out, you're a lot dumber than I thought.