Men In Black Movie 1997 Script

杰瑞发布于2025-12-18

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They are the best-kept secret in the universe. Working for a highly funded yet unofficial government agency, Kay (Tommy Lee Jones) and Jay (Will Smith) are the Men in Black, providers of immigration services and regulators of all things alien on Earth. While investigating a series of unregistered close encounters, the MIB agents uncover the deadly plot of an intergalactic terrorist who is on a mission to assassinate two ambassadors from opposing galaxies currently in residence in New York City.

Start [The opening titles, cast, and crew are shown as a small bug flies around the screen before being swallowed by a dragonfly, which then flies around a desert landscape, through and in-between various vehicles, eventually right into the windshield of a truck]
Truck Driver:
Goddamn bugs... Illegal Aliens [The camera shows the back of the van, where seven illegal immigrants wait. The driver squirts some wiper fluid onto the glass, which clears it up a bit, and then sees something worse up ahead. Headlights, eight of them, all pointed at him, sealing off the road.] [He bites his lip and calls over his shoulder, to the back of the van.]
Driver:
Oh sh*t! Silencio! Deja me hablar. Oh crap!
[The van slows to a stop in front of the parked cars, all government-issue four doors with "INS" stenciled on the sides. Seven or eight INS agents stand in front of the cars imposingly. Their apparent leader steps forward and comes to the window. The driver rolls it down. Agent Janus, blonde-haired, blue-eyed, also government issue, looks at him and sighs.]
Agent Janus:
Well. Nick the Dick. What a surprise. Where you comin' from, Nick?
Nick:
Fishing in Cuernavaca.
Agent Janus:
Sure you were. What do you say we have a look at your catch, huh? [opens the door] Come on. [the Agents fling open the rear doors, revealing a dozen Mexicans, hopeful immigrants without official permission. Agent Janus looks at the Driver, who's now held by two other Agents, and shakes his head.]
Agent Janus:
Me, I woulda thrown 'em back. (to the passengers, in Spanish) Vamanos. Fuera. Hagan una lina! (Let's go. Out. Form a line!) [They pile out of the van.] What do you get, Nick? Hundred bucks a head? Two hundred? I hope you saved it all for your lawyer, my friend, 'cause you're gonna need it.
[Another car, a Ford, pulls up. Two men get out, dressed in plain black suits, crisp white shirts, simple black ties, shiny black shoes. Kay, fiftyish, is the apotheosis of world-weary; his partner, Dee, mid-sixties, is just weary. They approach the INS agents.]
Kay:
We'll take it from here.
Agent Janus:
Who the hell are you?
[Kay and Dee flash some form of ID.]
Kay:
INS Division 6.
Agent Janus:
Division 6? I never heard of Division 6.
Kay:
Really? [Kay and Dee move past him and approach the row of nervous immigrants.] Who you got your money on, Dee?
Dee:
Tough call, Kay.
[He walks down the row, studying the faces, greeting each one cheerily in subtitled Spanish.]
Kay:
!Oye! Que pasa, coma estas? Hey! (What's up, how are you?) Abuela, no se preocupe, . Bienvenida a los Estados Unidos. (Don't worry grandma. Welcome to the United States.) A donde vas? Nogales? Buscando trabajo, no? Tu, lo mismo? (Where are you going? Nogales? Looking for work? You too?) Y tu? Es un placer verle aqui. (And you? The same?) ['One by one, their faces relax, reassured by Kay's calm demeanor. When he reaches the fifth Guy, a man dressed in a cloak; he keeps the same cheery tone, but] Y tu? (And you?) Que dices si te rompo la cara? (What if I break your face?) [The Guy smiles and nods. Kay stops. His own smile broadens and he drops a hand on the Guy's shoulder.] Es muy feo, no? Y no hablas ni una palabra del Español! (You're very ugly, no? You don't speak a word of Spanish!) [Again, the Guy smiles and nods. Kay looks back at Dee.] We got a winner here, Dee. (to the others) El resto de ustedes pueden irse. (The rest of you can leave!)
Agent Janus:
No se mueven! (Don't move!)
Kay:
Sube al camión y vete. (Get in the truck and leave.)
Agent Janus:
Sir! Sir, you can't just --
Kay:
Don't "Sir" me, young man. You have no idea who you're dealing with. ¡Entra en el camión ahora mismo! (Get in the truck right now!) [the cloaked man tries to leave as well, but Kay stops him] We're gonna have a little chat with our friend here. You fellas can hit the road ... and keep on protecting us from dangerous aliens.
[Kay and Dee escort their captive across the road and over a small rise, leaving the stunned INS agents standing alone in the roadway.]
Agent Janus:
You ever heard of Division 6?
2nd INS Agent:
There is no Division 6. This is bullshit.