Fart: A Documentary Movie Script

Man:

Have you ever heard of anybody - lighting a belch?

- ( laughs ) Well, that's because it doesn't- Seriously, it's two different gases.

( woman laughing ) Lighting a belch.

Probably wasn't funny for the first caveman that farted on the fire.

( laughing ) I'm just saying.

( farting ) Steve Baxter: Anyway, going back to the basis of farting, it's-- it's a-- a metabolic process.

Quite natural.

So why do people find it obnoxious?

- Well, the thing is-- - It's rude!

it's a bit like smoking, isn't it?

When you smoke, you affect other people.

And when you fart, you can affect other people.

No, I think it's a problem of education.

Just people, society has established that you don't do this thing in front of people, and that's it.

But there are some people that do it.

Because men like noises.

Or a reaction.

And I have to wa-- I have to wait to expect-- expect is the word, I have to expect that my fart will be a silent one.

- So nobody hears it.

- ( laughing ) That's when your cheeks start to bulge.

( church bells tolling ) ( man farting ) I get really upset about this. Honestly.

- So you want equal rights for farting.

- Exactly-- of course.

This is for my ladies out there Who have a problem with their gas - ( glass shattering )

- Man:

In contrary to what they would have you believe... girls do fart.